Cracked magazine is gone, I think, but the website lives on. Today they have a list of the World’s Most Ridiculous Sports Team Names, which is pretty fertile ground for ridicule if you take any of them seriously.

My all-time favorite, the UC Santa Cruz Banana Slugs, is on their list — although they considered it a runner-up in their “Non-Threatening Animals” category. Their winner: Japanese pro baseball’s the Hiroshima Toyo Carp.

And you’d think “Non-Threatening Inanimate Objects”, which includes the Scottsdale Community College Fighting Artichokes and the winning Teutopolis (H.S.) Wooden Shoes would have room for — nay, be dominated by — the Wichita State University Shockers and their mascot, Wushock (pictured). But, no, he’s conspicuously absent.

I’m not a sports fan, and never have been, but I have a fondness for odd team mascots. Perhaps this is because at my high school, we were the Golden Tornadoes. And our colors were gold (duh) and maroon, which I always thought worked well together. That changed in my senior year, to Warhawks, but what high school senior is really interested in anything that happens at school any more?

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